A new me in 2010!

Can I make my goal in GPT this year?

Tuesday, June 16, 2009


I am sitting here now trying to keep the tears from falling. I just finished watching the movie "Fireproof" with Kirk Cameron in it. All I can say is wow.

Until this movie, I would have said that my marriage was a good marriage, but within the first 10 minutes of the movie I had recognized my husband and myself on the screen in front of me. More so...I recognized myself on the screen in front of me.

As the movie progressed I found myself drawn in wondering if it would indeed work and once the main character found Christ, I found myself longing for what once was. I am not now a Godly person. I won't lie. I haven't been to church but a handful of times since I left my father's home. I smoke like a freight train, I occasionally have a drink. I am very quick to anger...and when I am angry, I spew violent, cruel things from my mouth that burn the other person the same as acid.

I used to be "Godly." I used to walk closely with him. I used to know him.

I have forgotten him.

I have turned away from him.

I want the peace that I once felt. The comfort in knowing that it all was in His hands. The feeling of love knowing that someone other than me cared. I miss that.

So I am asking you all to pray for me. Pray hard for me..lol. I am a stubborn one and He will have to work extra hard on my heart. He already is.

Back to the original topic.

After seeing this movie, I realize that I need to not only find the Lord again, but I also need to be a better wife. After all, isn't that why I started this blog in the first place?

So...I will be buying the book "The Love Dare," and doing the dares in it. I want my marriage to be better. I want my life to be better.

So pray for me and wish me luck with "The Dare."