A new me in 2010!

Can I make my goal in GPT this year?

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Happy B-day To Me!

Birthdays are always a time of reflection for me. I look back over my life and remember the good times and smile, I frown over the bad times and I shed tears for the times I am still not sure of.

My life has not been all roses and candy. I am 27 and on my third marriage. My first husband was horribly abusive. I barely made it out of that marriage alive. My second husband (my daughters biofather) was lazy and an alcoholic. After six years and being homeless more than once with a child under 2, I moved on. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. My husband now is a wonderful man. He has helped me to heal all of those wounds that life has left on me. He has helped to take a broken heart and has pieced it back together. I truly believe that God led us to meet and fall in love.

My mom was sick my entire life. I can still remember taking a blanket that the EMT's had left at my house to show and tell in kindergarten. I thought it was so cool. At 13, she almost died. She was literally given 12 hours to live. She says she saw Jesus (all I saw was the ceiling, but I am not going to tell her she didn't see it, I know it's possible) and suddenly she was not dying anymore.

My father was a Marine. He was a perfectionist Marine. Nothing I ever did seemed good enough for him. He was also a Baptist preacher. We didn't get along very well. Yet since he went Home to be with the Lord, I feel as if a piece of me is missing. I miss him terribly even if we didn't talk much.

I have made my share of mistakes. I am a clean drug addict and a sober alcoholic. I will forever be a drug addict and an alcoholic. I am very aware of exactly how little it would take of either to cause me to fall. I once dabbled in the occult. I thought I knew everything. It amazes me now just how little I actually did know.

But I have come thru it. I wouldn't change any of it. All of it has molded me and made me the person I am today. I am stronger now than I was then. I am wiser (I hope..lol) than I was then. I am more self-confident than I was then.

So Happy B-day to me! Here's to another year!

I am woman...hear me roar....meow. :D

Birthday Clipart